Let me get this straight. You stop your car, get out, and try to capture a monkey standing in diaper, on a leash, by the side of the road because you think "it'll make a nice pet." The monkey chases your ass, because you've pissed it off, and it can sense your messed up intentions.
And the MONKEY'S crazy? Do you see that monkey? That monkey is laughing at you, dude. Because you're an idiot, and monkey's are really quite smart.