Kristen Chase wrote an (I thought) excellent post on the swag (dudes can we get another word? Cause I really hate that word) brouhaha (also a dumb word, sorry) at BlogHer and I commented on a related experience with an overreaction to material things I had at a party on the first night that caused me to devolve into much disproportionately dramatic self-loathing of a sort I have not experienced at BlogHer before. (And just to be clear, this was about ME, not the conference or the people or any entity planning or executing anything. Me. A lot of this, perhaps almost all of this, is our own stuff, people. Here's my weird, gearhead arm that likes cameras. Twist it.) I don't really know what was going on, other than I tend to get a little keyed up when I'm in the same building as Barack Obama, oh dear Lord, and I don't do crowds so well as time goes by and whatever, I have a hindbrain. I'm not immune. I'm not a jerk but I'm not perfect, particularly when cameras are involved. It's a sickness.
My good friend and colleague Zandria talked me down off of this particular tiny ledge, partially because she's a nice and logical person who's as calm as anyone you'll come across in most circumstances, and partially because we were trying to have fun and there's no better way to ruin a party night than to get all tragic over a video camera or - God help me, it could have been worse - a beach towel. Thanks, Zan, for telling me I wasn't insane every time I said I was. You know how it went down. You are amazingly stable and if it weren't for people like you I'd be a hotter mess and I wouldn't be nearly as pleased with many things and experiences in my life. The end.
That's me with the righteous Zan (right) and our other (also righteous) friend and colleague Karen aka Sassymonkey, at the gathering right after the episode related above. Funnily (funny? funnily? Ugh, I hate that) enough, I won a Blackberry in a good old-fashioned RAFFLE either right before or after this, I can't remember. My grandma would be so proud. I mean, she wouldn't understand what a Blackberry was or did or stood for, but raffle winning is big in my family. That's fair and square, bitches. That's church stuff. Maybe we can do Bingo next year, if we can get a permit. There's no arguing who wins Bingo.
Anyway, my comment over at Kristen's place is likely the most intelligent statement I'll have on this matter at any point in print so I figured I'd record it here. Also, it caused the Bloggess to mention both me and love (seriously) and a miniature donkey (which, if I saw in a bar I'd be so excited and want to sit by, no doubt, especially if she were there too) in an ensuing comment, so basically I needed to record this, which you may understand. And if you don't, you're probably way less geeked out over similar things (love! me! a miniature donkey! Jenny!) on occasion than I am and I congratulate you. I'll take genuine props from any number of the fantastic women I've met through this conference than *almost* anything you can put in a bag. I don't know about you, but I'm totally in this for the positive reinforcement, as it turns out. I've been operating at a deficit, perhaps. It's amazing what it does for you. My skin looks great.
More on that later. Meanwhile, comment, and I will send you absolutely nothing but my love because I left pretty much all of the other stuff on the table in the room when I had my yearly 5 a.m. meltdown fearing paying extra to check my stuff and the suitcase I was worried about STILL only weighed 39.5 pounds. Meaning? I could have brought the peanut butter and all the stuff from Suave!
(To whom it may concern: check it. Original content. I can still do this! At least once anyway. This is my real free conference gift in action, from all of you. I owe you big for the kicks in the ass.)
I read your comment and it rocked - hard. But not as hard as you.
One of the best parts of my weekend was our walk.
Posted by: Carmen | July 28, 2009 at 12:14 AM
Thank you, Carmen! Mine too. I'm so glad we did that but I'm sorry we didn't make it out there again together. I loved our conversation and I hope we can keep it up. You are beautiful inside and out. We'll have to do a Manhattan 5k next summer. :)
Posted by: laurie | July 28, 2009 at 09:15 AM
I would so be down with Bingo. I fucking love Bingo.
I think I said this already, five or ten times, but I ADORE you and hanging out with you was a BlogHer highlight in my book. I can't wait to live near you and hopefully hang out more frequently.
Posted by: grace | July 28, 2009 at 10:41 AM
I love that photo of the three of us.
And I am so there for Bingo. Maybe we should just invade a Bingo hall en masse. I bet Suzanne could find us one.
Posted by: sassymonkey | July 28, 2009 at 12:23 PM
some of my favorite moments of my blogher were hanging out with you. I want you to know that. And we need to do it more often.
Posted by: jodifur | July 29, 2009 at 09:17 PM
Oh, my God! "Righteous" Zan. You're too funny. Yes, I'm quite often described as calm and rational, so I'm not surprised to read that. But still, it's nice of you to say. I take it as a big compliment! :)
Posted by: Zandria | July 31, 2009 at 10:33 PM